LisaB: Hi Sandy! 

GSandy: Everyone. Sorry I'm late. No power! 

frenchfoodADM: Hi Sandy 

Katheen: Hi Sandy! 

Deborah: Hi, Sandy! 

hope: i just got here too; i'm at work 

LisaB: That's ok...I was telling them you might have that glitch. Glad you made it! :) 

GSandy: OK! Hi 

hope: hi 

LisaB: Well, since it is after 2, why don't we go ahead and get started? 

GSandy: Sounds Good. 

LisaB: Let me just quickly run through the chat protocol so we are all on the same page... 

hope: this is my first chat. is there a procedure i should know? 

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hope: lol sounds good 

LisaB: I will be moderating the chat. If you have a question for Sandy, please type "?", if you have a comment, type "!" 

LisaB:When you are finished with what you are saying, please type "/" 

LisaB: You too, Sandy, just so I know when to call on the next person... 

GSandy: OK/ 

LisaB: Then when it is your turn, I will call on you and you can ask your question or make your commnet. Keeps things running smoothly--usually! :) 

LisaB: Any questions about the protocol?/ 

frenchfoodADM: guess not/ 

LisaB: Ok then, let me introduce our guest, Sandy Gookin...mother of 4 lively boys and the author of the book "Parenting for Dummies"... 

LisaB: Sandy, would you like to open?/ 

GSandy: Sure! 

GSandy: I'm also the author of several computer titles 

GSandy: But I like my Parenting Book the best./ 

frenchfoodADM: ? 

LisaB: I'm impressed that you are so prolific with all those boys runing about...what are their ages?/ 

GSandy: Jordan 12, Simon 6, Jonah 5, and Jeremiah 4. Yeah, I was busy for a while!/ 

LisaB: Go ahead, Anne/ 

frenchfoodADM: What was your first book published and how long did it take for you to get it accepted by a publisher?/ 

GSandy: My first book was Parenting For Dummies. 

Staci: ? 

hope: ? 

Katheen: ? 

GSandy: The process is quite long for non computer titles. It took a couple of months to sell the idea. 

GSandy: But it normally takes about 18 months for trade books./ 

LisaB: Staci, go ahead/ 

Staci: Were you a SAHM when you started writing, or did you work outside the home? 

LisaB: Go ahead, Sandy :) / 

GSandy: SAHM. Remember I was pregnant for 3 years running. I still do everything from home including helping to run a local community theatre. 

GSandy: I try not to leave too often because I love where I live./ 

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LisaB: Hope, go ahead/ 

hope: What type of writing did you do before the book, and how did you break into publication?/ 

GSandy: I did a lot of business stuff.Manuals etc. Including parenting stuff for newsletters. However, my husband is the one who started the For DUmmies books. 

GSandy: He's the original Dos For Dummies guy. That helped somewhat but I still had to jump through all the hoops. 

GSandy: Which means the proposal and outline, sample chapter, etc./ 

LisaB: Wow! That is very cool..I didn't know that! OK...Kathleen...go ahead! :) / 

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Katheen: I've read much of your PFD book, and enjoy it thoroughly. I was wondering if you had any other parenting books on the way: 

GSandy: I'm working on a Windows 2000 book right now. As soon as I finish with it, I'm going to work on a book that teaches people how to be a stay at home parent. 

GSandy: Not really should you, but the legistics of making it work. 

frenchfoodADM: ! 

Katheen: That sounds like a great idea, especially since it starts BEFORE getting pregnant, right? 

GSandy: What starts? Staying at home? 

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Katheen: I'm guilty of selfishness, sorry. I'm not yet married or pregnant, but intend to be a sahm 

GSandy: That's OK. Staying home can occur any time. It's all in organization. That's the key. Treating home like a business and running it that way. 

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Katheen: I agree, and support your idea. 

GSandy: I'm a firm beliver in delegation of duties and surrounding your self with brilliant people who can do all the chores you don't want to make time for./ 

Staci: LOL. 

GSandy: Kathleen, are your from Boston? 

LisaB: Nothing selfish about it, Katheen...it is a great thing to have a plan for! I have a question for you, Sandy... 

GSandy: OK lisa/ 

Katheen: Yup, 

LisaB: When your youngest 3 were all little and home, how did you manage tkaing care of them and your writing? Did you have help or childcare...what are your secrets? LOL/ 

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GSandy: No childcare. I get up early and write. I nap when they did and then I'd write when they were in bed. 

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Katheen: ? 

GSandy: I did the editing for PFD with Jeremiah nursing. I just slid back in my chair and it worked great. 

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GSandy: Also, my office has lots of toys and the kids know they only time they have to be quiet is when I'm on the phone. Usually an interview. But if they're not quiet, well, so be it./ 

LisaB: That's a great attitude to have! Anne, go ahead/ 

frenchfoodADM: I think that will be a great book, so many women are making the transition from careerwoman to sahm w/o any idea on what it should be like, going by old stereotypes, great idea!/ 

GSandy: Thank you. I'll tell my Literary Agent you said so!/ 

LisaB: Katheen...go ahead. / 

Katheen: What about housework? Do you and your husband share pretty well? 

GSandy: I do want to make it clear that I do have help with housecleaning and such. I don't want to take time away from my kids to do dishes. Although I do spend time teaching them how to clean./ 

LisaB: YOu read Katheen's mind! LOL/ 

GSandy: We all have our chores, including Dan (husband and 5th child!)/ 

frenchfoodADM: I envy you/ 

GSandy: You could look at my stomach after having 4 boys (last 2 were 11 pounds) and that envy would go away/ 

LisaB: Sandy, have you always been a fairly organized person, or was this something you had to learn out of
necessity?/ 

GSandy: I learned. I've also learned to delegate. Figuring out you don't have to do everything yourself takes a tremendous load off yourself. Also, pick what's important. 

GSandy: The living room being tidy is important. Clean toilets? Well.../ 

Deborah: ? 

Katheen: Yes, you do read my mind. 

LisaB: Go ahead Deborah.../ 

Deborah: How many hours per day do you actually spend writing? 

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Sheri: Hello Everyone 

GSandy: Oh wow, I couldn't say. Right now it's a lot so my mom and dad are good about taking the kids to the park and such. This Windows 2000 book has to be done when Windows is released. BTW, don't upgrade!/ 

Deborah: LOL...thanks for the tip! :-)/ 

GSandy: I'm also spending many hours at night writing. I went to bed at 2AM this morning. Yuck! Nap time is coming up real soon/ 

Deborah: So, then if you're writing between naps and such, how do you quickly change hats?/ 

Deborah: ...er, during naps..../ 

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GSandy: I'm a woman! We always change hats. I never have liked that question ,'What do you do?' We all do lots of things. I write, I play the piano, I play with the kids, love to garden, love to sing. I do lots and I just flow from one to the other. Being really flexible helps.\ 

GSandy: And my naps can be 15 minutes and I'm good. Just prop your feet up so they are above your heart and you get a better nap./ 

LisaB: Sandy, we have a lot of moms who are just starting out with their writing careers on the list...what advice do you have for them as far as learning to balance parenthood and writing?/ 

GSandy: Oh, and I take lots of vitamins./ 

frenchfoodADM: I'm going to try that in a little while, ;-)/ 

GSandy: Parenting comes first. Writing can be snuck in. Turn off the TV! Give yourself proper deadlines and don't wait until the last moment. 

GSandy: Also, teach your kids how to play while you work. Teach kids how to cook so they can help with dinner and chores. / 

GSandy: I find more time writing when other people are probably watching TV. And I can write when the kids are happy to ride their bikes in the yard./ 

LisaB: Those are good tips...especially deadlines and scheduling. We were just talking about how many of us seem to let deadlines creep up on us and then we scramble to get things done!/ 

frenchfoodADM: I know, I know, that's my biggest problem/ 

GSandy: Oh yeah! I like to take the approach that I'm already behind and I try to beat the deadline. That way if a child is sick, I don't feel guilty about taking a day off to just cuddle with my kids. 

GSandy: I also have a hard time working when the weather is nice. I love outside!/ 

frenchfoodADM: ? 

Sheri: I wish I could start doing that. I am always up at 11:59 trying to beat a midnight deadline./ 

LisaB: Go ahead, Anne ./< 

GSandy: :-) Dan made me re-write chapter 1, ten times! Butt! But he was right. Then it took me 4 months. Right now we can do a computer title in 6 - 8 weeks. 

GSandy: Its that outline that is what saves you writers out there. Make sure it is very complete./ 

LisaB: Do you and your husband do a lot of writing together?/ 

GSandy: yes./ 

LisaB: Does he work from home as well then? 

GSandy: yes./ 

Katheen: ? 

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LisaB: Go ahead Katheen/ 

GSandy: Dan has the really cool office above the garage. My office is a room in our house./ 

Katheen: I would think that the Windows 2000 project is pretty technical, and probably requires a lot of study time too. Where do you find it? 

GSandy: 2 AM is a great time to read! 

GSandy: Actually, we get what is called a Beta version of the product. 

frenchfoodADM: ? 

GSandy: Everyone has to learn and write at the same time./ 

LisaB: Anne.../ 

frenchfoodADM: so you said not to upgrade, why was that?/ 

GSandy: Windows 2000 doesn't work well yet. It's not anything better than Windows 95 or Windows 98. You usually never have to upgrade anyway./ 

frenchfoodADM: that's good, I'm still using Win 95/ 

Lain 

GSandy: I would be too if I didn't have to write about new products. Actually, I'd still have Windows 3.1/ 

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LisaB: Me too, Anne. :) Sandy, since you dh is at your house during the day, does he help with the kids throughout the day?/ 

GSandy: Yes. We have a brief meeting talking about our day. Usually coffee outside on the porch. If I need special quiet time because of times like this, he'll take the kids somewhere or outside. We trade off alot. But I've had to teach Dan how to be this way. It didn't come naturally for him./ 

GSandy: Oh Gosh, Dan would probably hate that I just said that!/ 

frenchfoodADM: it never does for most men I would think, at least not with my dh, he's getting pretty good though/ 

Katheen: ? 

Deborah:? 

LisaB: That is wonderful, though, that you have that! I would love that! Although my dh is pretty accomodating when I need him to be./ 

LisaB: Katheen.../ 

Katheen: It's clear that your success depends on ENERGY, where do you get it to stay up til 2? Vitamins and naps?

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GSandy: Low carb eating, lots of vitamins, lots of water, outside air, and lots of Diet Coke late at night/ 

LisaB 

Deborah.../ 

Deborah: I share a writing career with my husband and often get shadowed by him by people's, "Gee, Eric, I really enjoyed your last book," even on books we co-authored. Have you ever felt shadowed by Dan, and if so, how do you handle it?/ 

GSandy: Oh yes! 

GSandy: I finally realized "Dan Gookin" sells books. 

GSandy: We just finished an Excel book together. I did most of the work but his name came first and is listed as the author in all the trade books. 

GSandy: I finally realized, "Hey! Iget the money so who cares!". Besides, he gets all the techy nerdy questions that I don't have to mess with 

Deborah: Uh huh...but once in a while MY name gets listed! LOL/ 

Deborah: LOL! Yes, I pass all reader questions to Eric... :-). 

GSandy: We also have worked out a nice devision of labor. He's the better computer book writer, I'm the better business person. I handle all the busines meetings./ 

Deborah: ? 

GSandy: I'm happy that my name does get on the books though./ 

LisaB: Sandy, what has been your biggest challenge as a SAHM and writer?/ 

LisaB: And how have you dealt with it?/ 

GSandy: Not letting the weight of so much to do get to me. 

GSandy: I realize that I've made my choices to be here and do what I do. I'm lucky that I don't have to dress up for business meetings and eat lunch out every day. 

GSandy: I also pray every night for strength. I sing and play the piano when I get stressed. And sometimes I can eat a whole package of OReo's. 

GSandy: Mostly, I just go outside and water things. That relaxes me./ 

LisaB: Bet your plants hate to see you coming during an exceptionally stressed out period! LOL 

Katheen: ? 

LisaB: Deborah.../ 

GSandy: Ha! Yeah!/ 

Deborah: How long did it take you and Dan to define your roles in your shared profession? For both family and work things..../ 

GSandy: Sometimes we still have to have talks. I was a speech major in college and so I'm big on discussions and talking about things that bug me. 

GSandy: Great story. When we first started dating 

GSandy: we went to some business meetings and it just killed me to sit there and listen and not speak up. So I asked him about it. 

GSandy: He said to speak up because he hated business. 

GSandy: Sometimes we simply state: I'll do this if you do that. / 

LisaB: Trade-offs are good! Go ahead, Katheen.../ 

Katheen: have your children given you any ideas for any further book, like childrens books? 

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GSandy: They give me ideas for parenting topics more than anything. They get into situations that remind me of problems I see other parents face./ 

GSandy: Besides, there's not as much money in writing children's books./ 

frenchfoodADM: ? 

LisaB: Anne.../ 

Katheen: There is a new book coming out on what parents SHOULDN"T do, what do you think about that? 

frenchfoodADM: So did you get paid fairly well for PFD then? Are parenting topics big ? 

GSandy: I don't know. PFD has a list of rules that parents need to always look for as guidelines. It's be too hard to have a long list of Shouldn'ts rather than a list of what kind of PERSON people should be. 

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GSandy: ISn't it easier to have 5 basic rules and always have you go back and evaluate the situation based on the rules?/ 

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GSandy: PFD continues to make good money. Thank God./ 

GSandy: ALthough, I have to be honest, computer titles make the most money./ 

GSandy: Parenting topics are hard to sell. It's hard to get someone to pick up a parenting book because most people think they don't need any help./

Katheen: I agree with the pro-active rules anyday. 

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LisaB: Sandy, you have shared some really good advice with us today, and you have reaffirmed for me what I always try and remember...that our kids need to come first and everything else will follow as long as we plan well. 

LisaB: Are there any last questions for Sandy this afternoon?/ 

frenchfoodADM: ! 

LisaB: Anne.../ 

Deborah: ! 

Katheen: ! 

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frenchfoodADM: Just wanted to say thank you, I really enjoy hearing about your success with writing and family

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LisaB: Deborah.../ 

Deborah: Thanks! Excellent information! 

LisaB: Katheen.../ 

GSandy: It was great being here. Thanks for inviting me. And remember, delegate those chores, remember you are the Manager of your family so don't be afraid to get help getting the basics done./ 

Katheen: PFD is a great book, keep up the good work! 

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LisaB: Thanks so much for yout time, Sandy! 

GSandy: You're welcome./ 

LisaB: And thanks to all of you who came and participated! 

LisaB: ::::clap clap clap clap clap!!!::::: 

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